MAD MIKE'S JOKES ONLY THREAD - Page 30 - Yamaha Grizzly ATV Forum
General Discussion Welcome to General Discussion. This is a general forum where we talk about anything that is NON-GRIZZLY related. Please post in the appropriate forum that relates (we have engine forums, tire forums, accessory forums...and all the others too) to your topic. This way when someone (including us) comes here to look for answers, it will be a lot easier to find info. If you are posting something in general that you cant find a forum for, then this is the place to put it. Thanks for helping us try to get the info organized.

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post #436 of 441 Old 03-28-2016, 02:35 PM
 
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While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a ****roach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?"

07 Blue Grizzly 700 EPS
26" GBC Grim Reapers - 14" Machined ITP SS212s . Moose dual zone heated grips & thumb . Viper Max 3K w/AmSteel-Blue Rope . Coop45 Mod 3, EPI Purple spring . Rox Risers & Aero Fly bars . Totron 12" combo LED bar . Rigid Duallys (angled out) . xxbilletxx 1" front spacers . Yamaha HD front bumper . ODI Rogue lock-on grips . Ricochet skids - full set . Plano 1510 rear box . Elka Stage 3's . Back-up lights . Electrical stuff . Gold plugs x3 . Grip mitts . Uni Filter . AmsOil . Halos
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post #437 of 441 Old 04-21-2016, 05:10 PM
 
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2016 Grizzly 700 Special Edition W/EPS - Carbon Metallic
27in Kenda Bearclaw HTR
Ricochet Full Skid Plates w/UMHV
Viper Elite 3000lb Winch w/Amsteel Blue
Totron 12in & 6in LED Light Bars
Yamaha Rear Cargo Box
PowerMadd Guards & Wraps
RotoPax 4 gal Fuel Pack

2009 Rhino 700 Special Edition - Black
27in Sedona Rip Saw on ITP Black SS108 Wheels
Viper Max 4000 w/Amsteel Blue
Ricochet Full Skid Plates, K&N Filter, EZ Steer Power Steering

Totron 12in LED Light Bar & 4 - 3in Cubes
J Strong Roof & Windshield

J Strong Front & Rear Bumpers
J Strong Dual Battery Isolator


2002 Grizzly 660 - SOLD

US Govt survey shows three out of four people make up 75% of the total population.
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post #438 of 441 Old 05-01-2016, 08:38 PM
 
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The Vacation Genie



While walking on a beach during one of his many vacations,
Obama found a bottle on the sand and picked it up. Suddenly,
a female genie rose from the bottle and with a smile said,
“Master, may I grant you one wish?”

Obama responded, “Don’t you know who I am? I don’t
need any common woman giving me anything.”

The shocked genie said, “Please, I must grant you a wish or
I will be returned to that bottle forever.”

Obama thought a moment, then after grumbling about the
impertinence of the woman said, “Very well, I want to awaken
with three white women in my bed in the morning –
so just do it and be off with you.”

The annoyed genie said, “So be it!” and disappeared.

The next morning Obama awakened with Lorena Bobbitt,
Tonya Harding, and Nancy Pelosi in his bed.

His penis was gone, his knees were broken, and he had no health insurance.

Kevin
Retired Fulltime RV'er
1999.5 F350 4X4 CC Diesel Flatbed
2007 Alpenlite Defender Toyhauler
2008 Yamaha Grizzly 700 EPS
One Tough Kitty Named Bob
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post #439 of 441 Old 05-08-2016, 09:43 AM
 
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2016 Grizzly 700 Special Edition W/EPS - Carbon Metallic
27in Kenda Bearclaw HTR
Ricochet Full Skid Plates w/UMHV
Viper Elite 3000lb Winch w/Amsteel Blue
Totron 12in & 6in LED Light Bars
Yamaha Rear Cargo Box
PowerMadd Guards & Wraps
RotoPax 4 gal Fuel Pack

2009 Rhino 700 Special Edition - Black
27in Sedona Rip Saw on ITP Black SS108 Wheels
Viper Max 4000 w/Amsteel Blue
Ricochet Full Skid Plates, K&N Filter, EZ Steer Power Steering

Totron 12in LED Light Bar & 4 - 3in Cubes
J Strong Roof & Windshield

J Strong Front & Rear Bumpers
J Strong Dual Battery Isolator


2002 Grizzly 660 - SOLD

US Govt survey shows three out of four people make up 75% of the total population.
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post #440 of 441 Old 05-08-2016, 07:21 PM
 
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YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR OWN AGE AND THINKING, "SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD". WELL ... YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE.

MY NAME IS ALICE , AND I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA ON THE WALL, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME. SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 30-ODD YEARS AGO. COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN?

UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT. THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE.

AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL. 'YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG,' HE GLEAMED WITH PRIDE.

WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?' I ASKED.

HE ANSWERED, 'IN 1975. WHY DO YOU ASK?’

YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!', I EXCLAIMED.

HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALD, WRINKLED FACED, FAT-ASSED, GRAY-HAIRED, DECREPIT, SON-OF-A-BITCH ASKED, 'WHAT DID YOU TEACH?

2016 Grizzly 700 Special Edition W/EPS - Carbon Metallic
27in Kenda Bearclaw HTR
Ricochet Full Skid Plates w/UMHV
Viper Elite 3000lb Winch w/Amsteel Blue
Totron 12in & 6in LED Light Bars
Yamaha Rear Cargo Box
PowerMadd Guards & Wraps
RotoPax 4 gal Fuel Pack

2009 Rhino 700 Special Edition - Black
27in Sedona Rip Saw on ITP Black SS108 Wheels
Viper Max 4000 w/Amsteel Blue
Ricochet Full Skid Plates, K&N Filter, EZ Steer Power Steering

Totron 12in LED Light Bar & 4 - 3in Cubes
J Strong Roof & Windshield

J Strong Front & Rear Bumpers
J Strong Dual Battery Isolator


2002 Grizzly 660 - SOLD

US Govt survey shows three out of four people make up 75% of the total population.
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post #441 of 441 Old 06-25-2016, 01:35 PM
 
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***My buddy sent me this....

I was in a job interview and the manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me."
So, I put it under my arm, walked out of the building and went home.
Eventually he called my mobile and said, "Bring it back, here, right now!"
I said, "$200 and it's yours."

Jim,
Fast Green Convertible "06" 660 on 26" BH OG's with Stock Wheels.
COOP45 Primary, 1.5 mm shim, -1.5 mm belt, Purple Secondary Spring,
21 gram weights, weight covers reduced to 29 mm diameter and a 2 mm Cut Cam Plate.
2 heat range hotter plug, Warn Winch, Passenger Foot Rests, Rock Deflectors, Heated Grips and Hand Mitts,
Grab Strap, Cooling System Up-Grade and multiple position mirrors.
8040 miles, 812 hours on 1-1-15
Y.A.C.C. #43
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